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Backing progress Limavady has finally acquired a chiropractor. Jim and Cindy Cocks come from the United States and have opened shop in Anderson Avenue. Jim is the business end of the team and we can report that he is very good. If you have a sore back and arrive on horseback, he might even shoe the animal. The boys were back Our famous slow motion builders were back for a few days. Rumour had it that they were all working on Wellworth's renovation, which is taking nearly as long as the town's civic improvement scheme, but they suddenly returned with four shovels and a huge road-ripping machine and concentrated on producing traffic jams for most of a week. What is the best time to block the junction of Linenhall Street and Catherine Street? Of course it is: "Two o'clock in the afternoon, when everyone is trying to get back to work". I can't wait for the final act. Notice that nobody seems to be doing anything useful. They came back on the first Sunday of the month. This time they decided to stop fooling around and so they blocked the whole centre of town for the day. Is this the end of it? Can this newspaper survive without them?

The rainy rain. Guess what? It has been raining for the last few months. Those surprised by this statement might like to read our Weather warning. There has been so much rain this year that people are beginning to wonder how this island stays afloat. This is turning into a serious problem, as some farmers' fields have been waterlogged for months. The ducks, however, are getting used to this state of affairs and seem to be enjoying it; witness the field on the left.

The Backburn Park One of our intrepid reporters took a walk through Limavady the other day. He decided to follow the course of the Back Burn and ended up admiring Limavady's biggest town improvement scheme, apart from the ongoing centre of town slow motion building contest. Lets hope that they don't put this one on the back burner!
	You can still use the footpaths, as long as you are prepared to ignore some fallen fencing and the odd bit of rubble. The walk is well worth it on a good day, even if you only come to admire the builders' imaginative security arrangements which consist of a partial single wire barrier and a huge forbidding gate.
Our reporter decided to continue the walk right down to the river Roe. This is where one can still admire the last 100 yards of the burn. He went past the bus station and headed to the former council yard were he was confronted by a massive unofficial rubbish dump, just beside the river and the green fields. If you are looking for an old sofa, this is the place to go.

Can Limavady really hope to become the best kept small town in Ireland for the year 2000? On the left is a picture postcard of the future: "The Rough Fort near Limavady as seen from the edge of town". This paper would like to suggest a clean-up campaign. A dump so close to the river and the town is bound to attract rats and cause pollution.

Open Days at Limavady College The Tech had two open days this month, which means that hordes of young people thirsting for knowledge descended on the place from all over the area. Judging by the exhaustion of the staff, the event was a resounding success. We hear that some places are still available so if you haven't enrolled for the course of your choice, don't despair. Rumour has it that the computing courses are especially cool.

Here we don't go again! Fans of the town improvement scheme will be delighted to hear that the builders came back and slowed the traffic to a crawl for several humorous days. Various readers of this paper have approached the editor with pithy suggestions as to how to move forward and out of this mess. One idea was that we should give every one of the planners a bucket and a spade and send them to Benone Beach to play - thus diverting their attention from the centre of our town. This paper, of course, wouldn't dream of printing anything like that.

Business as usual

Talk of Spring and Flowers Just in time for the right time of the year, when the first buds are forming in the Country Park and the dark and dull days of winter seem to have gone for good, we have been informed that the valley now has a Gardening Society. On Thursday the 30th of March a visiting speaker - Dr Turbitt - will give an illustrated talk about spring flowers - in the recreation centre. All are welcome, as long as they bring a pound. Members get in for free.

Night time joggers, beware Sunday the 26th The Dog Leap Road, which leads to the Country Park, seems to be a dangerous place in the dark. Last night the gate of Dog Leap House took a frontal hit. Judging by the tracks, no attempt was made to swerve, showing either great attention to detail or total stupidity. A somewhat dented white car was found abandoned near the entrance to the Country Park.
All this might well be connected with the rising tide of vandalism in the town. Hardly a weekend goes by without some form of destruction to either plant or property or both, in the centre of town. Why is it that drunks often rip trees out of the ground, but you hardly ever spot them planting one. Don't gardeners drink?

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