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They are building again Heavy machinery is arriving to help fill the gap between the Chinese takeaway and the Thatch. It looks as if the former is in danger of being taken away entirely, and the latter has turned blue with fear of a similar fate. If past records are anything to go by, they'll knock down either one of those two and re-build it the minute the new building is finished.

Signs of the Times   This large sign has suddenly appeared outside Radisson's - Limavady's only luxury hotel. It reads: Global changes - late cancellations - an honest offer - £49.50. Cynics will of course wonder that if this is an honest offer - what would you call the much higher prices charged previously? Our widely travelled editor commented: "This simply brings them into line with comparable continental hotels, though still a bit on the steep side" whereas Tudor, the newshound, growled: "Never trust a price with a 9 in it!"

Here is another sign of our times. This colourful little group of future customers has left their toys behind and instead is taking a look inside Marshall Howe's vegetarian emporium fo find out what a real honest to goodness life sized vegetable looks, feels and smells like. It isn't so long ago when most children in Limavady could have had the same experience by going into their back garden. It is to be hoped that these young experimentalists will all grow up loving their greens. Customers were later on heard wondering about how all these tiny teeth marks got on the vegetables.

Honour amongst Thieves   The well known object on the left is a traffic cone. Currently quite a common object in Limavady. There are cones and there are cones, but this one is A CONE - ie it belongs to the Limavady police. Observant readers will spot the rather sloppy alteration at the top of the cone spelling out 'LIM' for Limavady. It occurred to our reporter that the only ones likely to steal a lot of official police traffic cones are members of another police force - say from the Coleraine direction. Why else go to the trouble to write 'LIM' on every one of them? Unless of course an unfortunate young copper had to write 'LIM' five hundred times as a form of punishment.

Adult what?   Regular readers of this notorious publication will know that we are always on the lookout for something new and exciting happening in Limavady. This being so, can anyone tell us what is going on on the top floor of Super Value? The place looks harmless enough but they are obviously hoping to appeal to a new kind of customer. And what has Santa to do with all this?!

Just Ploughing Along   These two beauties took part in the 6th Northern Ireland Vintage Ploughing Championships - under expert supervision of course. The event was held in the large field overlooking the Country Park, and by a brilliant bit of planning, the park held a triathalon that day as well. It takes too much space to do justice to the ploughing in this small column, so those interested can follow this link to the racy reportage by our agricultural correspondent, Jochen the Lueg.

The Magilligan Pier Work on the new pier is progressing steadily. Nobody would dare say that this is the fastest construction project in the world without expecting instant and valid contradictions, but at least most of the access bridge is in place. Elsewhere the diggers are still milling about at water level. Sharp eyed readers will notice that even the new ferry is hanging around already.

Voices from Above   The other day as our editor was putting in a strenuous day's work, he was suddenly woken by the sounds of gulderin' coming from up high. When he guiltily raised his eyes to the sky, he noticed three of Orange's men painting the mobile phone mast - you've guessed it - bright grey. The sound effects were caused by their attempts to communicate with ground base. Considering who they are working for, wouldn't you have thought that someone would have issued them with mobile phones?

 

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