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April 1999

The Great Limavady Duck Shoot

Punctually at one o'clock on the 1st of April, the great Limavady duck shoot took place. There would have been a large crowd if it hadn't been for all the traffic going down Main Street, and the purpose of the large cages all along the road finally became obvious when several huge birds were released from within. Two of the extra large calibre guns traditionally used on this occasion can be seen on the right.

Everybody agrees that the event was a great success and the winner will be notified as soon as he leaves hospital. Thanks were expressed to Steven Spielberg for providing the wild fowl.

Blasting ducks
More Building works

This publication sent a reporter to examine the state of the Main Street repairs and it can only be said that you'll find some of the roughest civic improvement in this part of Ireland, should you get there without tripping.

What a mess!

Firemen collect

Limavady's finest are raising money for a children's hospice at the moment. They are doing a cycle race and other things and hope for thousands of pound via the web.

Fire engine


On Saturday the 3rd of April Limavady drew 2:2 with Ballyclare.

Following that, on Tuesday the 6th they were beaten 1:2 by Ards.

Being a friendly lot of chaps they played against the Northern Ireland juniors on the 8th, (to give the lads a run for their money) and let them win 1:2.

A Roof over Market Street

Thu 15th April 1999

Calls are heard again about roofing over Market Street. This is seen as the cure for customers deserting the town centre where everyone sells the same stuff and tries to charge more than everyone else.

This paper fears that this will lead inevitably to loud music being blasted at everyone shopping, whether they like it or not. Time will tell.

Who loves a traffic warden?

Some person called Trainor has been appointed to the post of traffic expert of Limavady.

His plan so far is to appoint traffic wardens to hound the already exasperated Limavady drivers into terminal breakdown. This could be fun to watch as I fear either civil unrest or collaborating wardens, depending on whose skull is softer.

Wheel clampers

Rumours have it that several dozen people's cars have been wheel clamped in order to finally force them to pay road tax.

The inevitable thought must be considered, that this new policy will ease the parking problem in town by about 90%, and hence make traffic wardens redundant on the day of appointment.

Imagine a town centre overrun by traffic wardens and not a car to be seen for miles, because they are all clamped.

Sounds like Limavady!

The by-pass, yet again.

Permission has been given to build the much needed by-pass from the Derry to the Coleraine road in 2003 or so. As this story has been running for the last 35 years, this paper is a bit doubtful whether anything will come of it.

One thing is certain, the place needs a by-pass because the traffic is getting worse.


Saturday 17th April 1999
Limavady against Dungannon 3-3. This was the last homegame of the season.

Wed 28th April 1999
Limavady beat Oxford United Stars 3-1 in the North West cup final. Well done boys.


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Limavady signpost with a collie

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